The Stuff of Life...
How many boxes does it take to hold all of your worldly possessions? I don't know. How many cubic meters of storage space are you willing to pay for for your worldly possessions? None!
While packing to move my family halfway down the globe, I have to make a lot of judgment calls. As the time gets closer, I become very aware of size and weight. I see everything as a piece of the 20 kg puzzle that is each suitcase. One bag per person... 20 kg/bag... 8kg carry-on each. That is a total of about 50 lbs each for a 3 year trip. Plenty. Today. Tomorrow it will seem impossible again! Yesterday it was impossible... but today, I think I can do it! Again! And, you can always count on about 23kg when they say 20, right?
What have I learned about packing? Do what the Kers do! I always imitate Hilary to the best of my ability. Now, I know that the Kers change their packing style every year, but the last trip they made to Africa they let each person pack his own trunk without breaking any laws... and then hoped for the best! We can buy clothes in Africa, but we will not get a new Barbie at the local market! We need the books we love in the languages we love... and they can only come from here. So, we take them. BUT... what about that kitchen gadget and handy tool for building the house? Well... what about it? We will survive. What if some bag gets lost and one person loses everything? That will be hard... especially if that person is 4 years old! But I'm sure that with the $100/bag from insurance, we will be able to survive and so will the 4 year old. Besides... the really important stuff has to fit in the 8kg carry-on bag... along with the extra underwear!
In the end, it is all stuff. Some is important stuff... some is beloved stuff. But none of it is life itself. And in the end it is just the very stuff of life that we are living for! For example... the love of our families... the love of our neighbors... the love of God and His Word... a vision... a mission... our heart's desire. That is what we live for. The embrace of a child... a tear on their cheek as they say good-bye to a grandparent or a cousin. Oh God... what are we doing ripping out their hearts like this again!
But, it is all a part of the love that is in us. You don't MIND leaving if you have nothing to love. It is the Portuguese concept of "saudade"... the pain of love... missing someone hurts, but it is good because in the pain, you know that you truly love them! Daring to love and leave... and come back! That is the stuff of life.
For a missionary, I think that these concepts get magnified: We have more family and neighbors than the average person... we multiply by number of countries that we call home. We simply have more people to love and leave and miss. We have a concrete vision and mission... heart's desire... a dream to follow out of love to God and our "neighbors"... so, we have a really good reason to rip your hearts out when it is time to leave! Coming back? Well, since "home" is in several different countries we are always coming BACK to somewhere. So, it all fits together. Love, leave, and come back.
Just remember, those of you standing at the airport wiping the tear from your eye as the child that left sticky spots on your sweater steps through security control... after the leaving, after the embrace, we get on the plane. Once they start the engines, we are no longer leaving you behind... we are on our way home! We will miss you... and we will come back.
While packing to move my family halfway down the globe, I have to make a lot of judgment calls. As the time gets closer, I become very aware of size and weight. I see everything as a piece of the 20 kg puzzle that is each suitcase. One bag per person... 20 kg/bag... 8kg carry-on each. That is a total of about 50 lbs each for a 3 year trip. Plenty. Today. Tomorrow it will seem impossible again! Yesterday it was impossible... but today, I think I can do it! Again! And, you can always count on about 23kg when they say 20, right?
What have I learned about packing? Do what the Kers do! I always imitate Hilary to the best of my ability. Now, I know that the Kers change their packing style every year, but the last trip they made to Africa they let each person pack his own trunk without breaking any laws... and then hoped for the best! We can buy clothes in Africa, but we will not get a new Barbie at the local market! We need the books we love in the languages we love... and they can only come from here. So, we take them. BUT... what about that kitchen gadget and handy tool for building the house? Well... what about it? We will survive. What if some bag gets lost and one person loses everything? That will be hard... especially if that person is 4 years old! But I'm sure that with the $100/bag from insurance, we will be able to survive and so will the 4 year old. Besides... the really important stuff has to fit in the 8kg carry-on bag... along with the extra underwear!
In the end, it is all stuff. Some is important stuff... some is beloved stuff. But none of it is life itself. And in the end it is just the very stuff of life that we are living for! For example... the love of our families... the love of our neighbors... the love of God and His Word... a vision... a mission... our heart's desire. That is what we live for. The embrace of a child... a tear on their cheek as they say good-bye to a grandparent or a cousin. Oh God... what are we doing ripping out their hearts like this again!
But, it is all a part of the love that is in us. You don't MIND leaving if you have nothing to love. It is the Portuguese concept of "saudade"... the pain of love... missing someone hurts, but it is good because in the pain, you know that you truly love them! Daring to love and leave... and come back! That is the stuff of life.
For a missionary, I think that these concepts get magnified: We have more family and neighbors than the average person... we multiply by number of countries that we call home. We simply have more people to love and leave and miss. We have a concrete vision and mission... heart's desire... a dream to follow out of love to God and our "neighbors"... so, we have a really good reason to rip your hearts out when it is time to leave! Coming back? Well, since "home" is in several different countries we are always coming BACK to somewhere. So, it all fits together. Love, leave, and come back.
Just remember, those of you standing at the airport wiping the tear from your eye as the child that left sticky spots on your sweater steps through security control... after the leaving, after the embrace, we get on the plane. Once they start the engines, we are no longer leaving you behind... we are on our way home! We will miss you... and we will come back.
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